Let`s talk about the eternal question of the existence: " Who am I? "
But does that actually make sense?
--> We grow up with the the idea: know who you are, stick to your roots!
In other ways: don`t ever change.
Strange that we get taught not to change too much. Why? Because all the fundaments society are build on would tumble down if everyone just kept evolving, growing and learning. That is exactly the reason why everyone gets stuck in a job they don`t like, relationships fail and people are bored with their own life.
I must admit, I ran around for a very long time with the same idea. Growing up in a system that is build to build you in such a way so you can last. I thought that was the way it should be. I saw it but the problem was: I did not see it for myself.
As humans in western society you get born, go to school, learn everything possible, go work or go study, get a job if you did not have one yet, get one partner and marry them. Done deal.
AND BEFORE SOME OF YOU GO WILD! There is nothing wrong with that, for some people it really works well and they are very happy with how they live and admit. Honestly, I envy that sometimes.
However, it is what it is: I did not feel good with that picture.
I had a vision of what type of person I wanted to be, since I was very young. Daydreaming was always a problem at school. I was a quiet kid with a strange hairstyle because my hair is simply... strange. I was never bullied but I was never cool either. I just kept to myself. I always had a vision of who I wanted to become: traveling, animal lover, artistic and I knew if I would ever buy a house it would be abroad (not in Belgium). Weird how all of that was already build inside me while the outer world showed me something different!
If I look back at all I asked for as a child, I realize now that I have achieved ALL OF THEM (except the one moment where I wanted to become a horse whisperer, still got to look into that! ). I really did achieved all of it, how crazy is that!? But the funny thing is, I achieved all of it but not in its original form. Let me show you:
- I wanted to be an artist in life, I worked as a designer. ( I imagined becoming a painter, because that was all I know as a child at that time. I did not know designers existed.)
- I wanted to become a fashion designers as a teenager and I did. ( I wanted to become the next Versace or whatever, because that was the only way I though fashion designers existed. Instead I became a digital nomadic fashion designer. )
- I wanted to go to Africa so bad, because traveling was what I loved a lot as a child and I did. ( I travelled to so many places in the world, except for Africa because I got lost in the whole world, as I did not realize before how much more there was! )
- I wanted to work for myself and I did. ( I imaged working by myself as a painter in a house in France. Because I did not realize I could work as a designer or coach all over the world from my computer! )
- I wanted to have a house abroad and I did. (I wanted to have a house in France because that was all I knew, I did not know Bali existed.)
- I wanted to find the love of my life and I did. (The love of my life was disguised in a handsome boy back then but I did not understand that the love of my life was MYSELF.)
In other worlds, my world that I had in mind evolved because of the steps that I took that I thought where just random, because I had forgotten all of the things I ever wanted as a kid.
I did not completely forgot them but I did not pursuit them very focused either. My beliefs as a child brought me to where I am now because I rejected subconsciously whatever the outside world was telling me.
So what am I actually trying to say here: we always have to keep evolving because the world around us evolves as well. You can not stick to being that one person you had in mind once, or you will get lost in boredom.
You control your future self as much as you possibly want! Let go of who you are because : you are nothing and everything! You are what you created and you can still create more! No one else defines who you are, only you do and you are the one who holds the power to change whenever you feel like it.
Don`t except your limits, you can be anyone you want to be if you let your ego down and accept that change has come for you. Realize you have to reinvent yourself over and over again.
So, to answer the question: " Who am I ? " stays unanswered.
In fact, you should ask yourself: "Who am I becoming ?"
Because there is no answer to who you are, as you are not static and you can only give an answer to who you want to become.
And trust me it took me a while to understand this, but I am glad I did. I had to reject an old belief system to create a new one and I have to say: I am so glad I did it because it feels so much lighter and better to be free and have control over yourself.
And you can do that too, if you really want it.
E L Z E
your creativity coach